Watch any korean love drama lately? I am sure 'Full House' , 'Princess Hours', 'Stairway to Heaven' are not unfamiliar to you. I like watching these love dramas, though my taste is somewhat limited to love stories with happy endings and mainly comedies. I dont like watching soapy dramas with a tearing scene every 10 minutes.
Watching these dramas would invariably make any real life relationship lifeless and boring. Love in dramas are invariably more interesting and full of hurdles that would make any experienced athlete green..I cant help but think note the following formula for love:
1) the two must be at logger heads when they first know each other.. The more they fight , the better their love will be in the end.. Usually they are not even friends, then they become friends later on..
2) There has to be a 3rd party or even 4th party competing for the love and affection of the protagonist.. anything lesser wouldnt make the love endearing or precious.. 3rd Parties are usually more glamourous looking (if the protagonist is a lady), and usually more spiteful, treacherous, with dirty tricks to 'steal' the protagonist' credit, or love. If there is a 4th party involved, its usually a guy, handsome one, fighting for the attention of the lady protagonist.
3) If the male lead/leads are good looking , the actress is very plain, girl-next-door look, while the 3rd party more glamourous (see point 2) If the male lead/leads are not good looking, actress will be drop dead gorgeous.. Usually in such a case, the drop dead gorgeous actress would also have another bf who is successful, handsome, and prince charming, but she usually choose the plain looking male lead over prince charming.. Even if the plain looking chap did not treat her as well as prince charming.. Basically opposites work very well in dramas
4) The male leads usually have respectable jobs. Even if their background seem humble, they usually make up for it by been very well educated eg. having phd, or doctorate, but doing some humble job for a more noble purpose.
5) Usually there are some evil people on the side, making life more difficult for the lead actresses/actors.. and making them realise their love for each other far surpass all these evil pranks...
6) Make sure there are lots of romantic slow thoughtful moments, and make sure that the lead actor and actress slowly discover each other's good points and fall in love and slowly act in considerate ways that show their love for each other..
7) Soothing Love songs are a must.. Make sure there are a few different love songs, with some fast upbeat ones for happy moments, slow sorrowful ones for tearjerking moments and that there are lots of MTV worthy scenes in the show..
8) Make sure there are some misunderstandings thrown in for good measure between the main leads. Usually they wont fall in love together, so the misunderstandings would help them mask their real affection and make sure, they only discover their love for each other in the last 4 episodes.. Because , hey, once they get married or they get together.. the story just doesnt sizzle anymore.. There is no fun in 'certainty'..
9) If the show is going to be sad, usually the protagonists who fall in love would inevitably fall in love, but found out they were brother/sister or were childhood sweethearts who simply couldnt forget each other even if they havent talked for more than 20 years and though they met each other for a while when they were children.
10) The men are very thoughtful, charming, careful about how women think, while the women wont be afraid to be the first to say they love the guy and even when the guy didnt show much interest or treat them badly, they would continue to treat the guy really really well, till the guy fall in love.. (or Vice Versa)
There you go, Add the above elements together in different portions, you get a potentially potent sizzling love story.. The twists and turns in the love dramas would make your own love a BEDTIME story by comparison.. No wonder we like watching them..
But It isnt REAL! you say.. Come on,seriously speaking, do you want to watch a love story when both not so good looking/ ok looking people fall in love in school/at work who do nothing much but watch movies, have dinner, day in day out, till the time when they apply for flat/buy condo/house, then married, have kids? Or just a love story about a couple living together making milk for babies, doing household chores together?
No? See? I rather have my korean love dramas anytime. .... Best of all, make it a show with all the good looking people.. pretty babes, handsome , rich hunks.. give me the whole works (But comedy kind please)!Because Life is REAL enough, I dont need my shows to be real too.. :D
Thursday, June 28, 2007
Been Solo
My china colleague was one of the 'jie mei' at our colleague's wedding last saturday.She mentioned about a fellow 'jie mei' who started talking about how nice her husband is the minute she knew my colleague was single. She started showing colleague her husband's sms ,how prompt he was in replying, how my colleague shouldnt be so choosy and quickly find a husband soon, etc and even proceeded to tell the bridegroom's brothers that my colleague is single. (she is one of those 'smug couple' breeds). My colleague just smiled.. and related the incident to us.(My china colleague has often been talking about her lack of partner during lunch and how she isnt young since she is already 27 , etc. She is very direct and her annecdotes were quite entertaining).
We were naturally pretty 'horried' by the 'smugness' of this 'sister' who had saw my colleague for the first time, and proceeded to boast about her marital status. The 'sister' is rather on the plump side and look like Ms Piggy. (I am channelling my mean side this morning). That night at the wedding dinner, we were all rather mean lah, telling our colleague how she should have said she had plenty of choices lah, so dont know how to choose..not like her , have to jump at the first opportunity . etc (We didnt say that to her lah..)
Just makes me wonder , why the smugness? What is the Big Deal about been part of a couple anyway? Does she think that been solo means 'unwanted' , 'undesirable', etc? Does that make her desirable because she is part of an entity called 'couplehood'?
I have been solo for the longest time since my last relationship about 3 years ago. I think my life thereafter improved by leaps and bounds (my relationship wasnt great and I was a fool). True, the nagging inconveniences of been solo is finding company to do the things you enjoy, to travel together, to hang out. More importantly, not having someone who can grow old with you..
While I get plenty of freedom in deciding what I want to do, since I dont have to 'report' to anyone, things can get very lonely as well. Loneliness can hit you anywhere but more so for soloists like me.. Especially in dark quiet nights.
Yet I dont see why been solo is such an issue (even if I am not young anymore). In Singapore, everyday, you are reminded of how you are not helping to procreate, how you need to find someone for sure,etc. There is 'Romancing Singapore' to remind you to quickly get rid of your solo state. 'I love children' campaigns to remind you to procreate and have children. Favourable housing schemes for couples and tax incentives are just some of the policies that glare at you. Been solo indeed seems to be a 'marginalised' existence in Singapore though things have improved over the years. (Now singles over 35 can buy any kind of flat on the resale market)
I am not saying I choose to be solo. I didnt choose it. Its just that I didnt meet anyone with whom I can connect with. There are times when I thought I met someone I could connect with, but circumstances often turn out to be otherwise, or things just didnt work out. Of course I'd like to be married, to find my 'soulmate' some day, but only if he is someone I can connect with, respect, have the same values with me. I wont choose someone who isnt it, just so that I can be part of a couplehood.
I sometimes will wonder why am I still solo? But these days, I am learning to smell the roses, enjoy and appreciate my blessings. For you never know what life brings you.I am learning to see life in a different light.
So, Dont be so smug, happy couples. I am happy you found your partners, but dont be so smug. Been solo isnt that bad. I am loving my freedom, my time , my blessings and taking it a day at a time. And for those who are solo, enjoy and dont just blindly settle !
We were naturally pretty 'horried' by the 'smugness' of this 'sister' who had saw my colleague for the first time, and proceeded to boast about her marital status. The 'sister' is rather on the plump side and look like Ms Piggy. (I am channelling my mean side this morning). That night at the wedding dinner, we were all rather mean lah, telling our colleague how she should have said she had plenty of choices lah, so dont know how to choose..not like her , have to jump at the first opportunity . etc (We didnt say that to her lah..)
Just makes me wonder , why the smugness? What is the Big Deal about been part of a couple anyway? Does she think that been solo means 'unwanted' , 'undesirable', etc? Does that make her desirable because she is part of an entity called 'couplehood'?
I have been solo for the longest time since my last relationship about 3 years ago. I think my life thereafter improved by leaps and bounds (my relationship wasnt great and I was a fool). True, the nagging inconveniences of been solo is finding company to do the things you enjoy, to travel together, to hang out. More importantly, not having someone who can grow old with you..
While I get plenty of freedom in deciding what I want to do, since I dont have to 'report' to anyone, things can get very lonely as well. Loneliness can hit you anywhere but more so for soloists like me.. Especially in dark quiet nights.
Yet I dont see why been solo is such an issue (even if I am not young anymore). In Singapore, everyday, you are reminded of how you are not helping to procreate, how you need to find someone for sure,etc. There is 'Romancing Singapore' to remind you to quickly get rid of your solo state. 'I love children' campaigns to remind you to procreate and have children. Favourable housing schemes for couples and tax incentives are just some of the policies that glare at you. Been solo indeed seems to be a 'marginalised' existence in Singapore though things have improved over the years. (Now singles over 35 can buy any kind of flat on the resale market)
I am not saying I choose to be solo. I didnt choose it. Its just that I didnt meet anyone with whom I can connect with. There are times when I thought I met someone I could connect with, but circumstances often turn out to be otherwise, or things just didnt work out. Of course I'd like to be married, to find my 'soulmate' some day, but only if he is someone I can connect with, respect, have the same values with me. I wont choose someone who isnt it, just so that I can be part of a couplehood.
I sometimes will wonder why am I still solo? But these days, I am learning to smell the roses, enjoy and appreciate my blessings. For you never know what life brings you.I am learning to see life in a different light.
So, Dont be so smug, happy couples. I am happy you found your partners, but dont be so smug. Been solo isnt that bad. I am loving my freedom, my time , my blessings and taking it a day at a time. And for those who are solo, enjoy and dont just blindly settle !
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